I AM AN INTROVERT (part II)

Okay. Here is the second half of my shpeal about introverts. You can find the first half HERE. 

Let me begin this post by reemphasizing that being an introvert is not a bad thing, or a synonym for "shy" or "anti-social." It is an inherently different way of interacting with others. Did you know that an introvert's brain is actually wired differently than an extrovert's? Their thought processes travel different paths!

Google it. I think it's amazing.

Now, knowing what we know about introverts, here are some tips for interacting positively with the introverts in your life. 

1.) INTROVERTS HATE "SMALL TALK"

I would prefer to give a prepared speech in front of a thousand people, rather than engage in "small talk" with a casual acquaintance. My worst NIGHTMARE is a social engagement where guests are given nothing more than food and time to mingle and chat. Especially if the atmosphere is noisy (people won't be able to hear me anyway). I'm weak just thinking about it.

The difference between a public speech and "small talk" is the task's structure (or lack thereof). Introverts are highly task oriented, so public speaking can actually be a high for me. I don't mind teaching classes, speaking in church, or leading a group with purpose. But I need time to prepare my thoughts! Making stuff up on the fly is stressful for my careful, perfectionist self. 

Let me give you some advice for those seeking to entertain introverts on a date, party, or weekend stay: Plan an activity with purpose. Give your guests something to DO. Pull out a board game, set up a volleyball net, institute a project...anything to help them relax, focus, and generate conversation beyond burdensome social pleasantries. But don't be surprised if you bring up a topic they're especially passionate about...and they talk your ear off!

2.) BE SINCERE
Sincerity is soooo important. I don't want to have to spend my precious energy discussing mundane, surface-level topics when as an introvert, I crave authentic relationships. I want to reeeally get to know someone and talk about things that mean something. Life stories. Real problems. Exciting ideas. Not 'how my day was' with people who don't care. 

I think Laurie A. Helgoe explains it well when she says:

“Let's clear one thing up: Introverts do not hate small talk because we dislike people. We hate small talk because we hate the barrier it creates between people.”

I prefer one-on-one interaction over a large group any day. Large groups make it difficult to connect with individuals on a personal level. 

Because I'm all about sincerity, my B.S. radar is especially receptive. If I sense someone acting phony or uninterested, I will immediately back off to guard my inner self and conserve energy for someone who is as invested as I am. I need validation that I'm not wasting my strength! 

A good friend

This is why introverts will often have a few, lastingly loyal friendships as opposed to an extrovert's large crowd of pals.We pour masses of energy into them and as such, are fiercely devoted. It takes a lot before I let someone in on my silly, free-spirited side. 

3.) BE KIND

Introverts rework every simple conversation in their mind to exhaustion. Because of this, be especially careful of critical remarks. One impatient tone, one biting comment on social media, one angry letter, will not be so easily erased by compliments and smiles the next day. Introverts will internalize them deeply...and they don't forget. Even if they truly forgive, they may remain wary--requiring time to build trust and really open themselves up to that person again.

Similarly, if you are rolling your eyes and gossiping about someone else, I will immediately put up a wall to protect myself. Why wouldn't I assume you do the same about me when I'm gone? Sure, nobody likes to be gossiped about.  But I believe introverts are even more sensitive to this, because their constant internal dialogue makes them especially hard on themselves. 

If corrections do need to be made, do so privately. Don't reprimand in front of a group, as this will be humiliating to an introvert's perfectionism. They hold very high expectations for themselves.

4.) DON'T TAKE THEM BY SURPRISE
I love to be social...but I absolutely have to be mentally prepared for it. I'm aware that this sounds absurd to those who are naturally outgoing. But it's true. Remember, conversation--especially small talk--is going to leech me of important energy. If I'm low on energy and I haven't prepped for it (like an athlete does for a big game), I'll probably run for cover from that neighbor at the grocery store (like, literally dodge out of an aisle before I'm seen), carefully screen my phone calls even from closest friends (I do so adore the inventor of texting), and fend off unexpected invitations for social engagements ("Uhhh...sorry. I have to do stuff...at my house...alone.") I need to beef up my store of social juices beforehand. I know of extroverts who go to similar lengths just to avoid being alone with their thoughts!

And for the record. If one more person shoves a phone in my face without warning and demands that I say "hello" to someone on the other end, I might throw something. Introverts don't perform their best 'on the spot.' 



5.) DON'T INTERRUPT
Conversations can be frustrating. Extroverts seem to be overly anxious to fill the slightest bit of empty space with noise. The silence makes them feel awkward and nervous, so they take the three seconds I needed to carefully find the right word, as a request to save the day! Then by the time there is another pause in the conversation, that interesting thought I had to contribute isn't even relevant anymore.

“While the introvert is reflecting on the question (thinking first), the extrovert takes this as an invitation to fill the void (talking first). As long as the introvert doesn't interrupt, the extrovert continues to fill the interpersonal space with talk. But as long as the extrovert talks, the introvert can’t think and stays mute. Mute means the invitation is still open, and continued talk assures that the introvert remains mute. By the time the extrovert pauses to ask, the introvert’s head is pounding and he or she just wants to get out so she can think. The extrovert just assumes the introvert had nothing to say, and moves on.”

Obviously, this is not the case with every conversation. But it has happened to me enough times that I can definitely relate. Trying to keep up the conversational pace of an extrovert is exhausting. 

6.) GIVE THEM 'THINK TIME'
Let me illustrate this with an example of a Sunday school class. The teacher poses a question. After 0.2 seconds, the silence makes the teacher antsy and immediately jumps in with their own answer. This cycle repeats itself through the entire lesson, unless a quick-thinking, fast-talking, extrovert can raise their hand first. Afterwhich, the teacher promptly moves on to the next topic.

Silence does not always mean a lack of things to say. The students were just beginning to process the question, make meaningful connections, and organize their words. Count a good 5-10 seconds next time before diving in, and give those poor introverts some solid THINK TIME! Then, after all the extroverts have been called on to share, a teacher's prodding as simple as, "Great! Anyone else have a thought?" a few times, will merit a surprising number of insights from the introverts quietly waiting their turn. I bet you'll be amazed by all they had to say after all.  

7.) DON'T ASSUME YOU KNOW WHAT THEY'RE THINKING

An introvert's mind is constantly swirling with thoughts, ideas, and opinions. Because of this, people often misconstrue my "thinking face" as being depressed or judgmental. Just know that I am probably only listening, daydreaming, reflecting, recharging, observing, remembering, waiting until you're done speaking, solving a problem, or making plans instead. Or I may be simply taking immense pleasure in the scene around me...without having to frolic around being the life of the party.

Introverts are gifted at self soothing. They won't burden you with their problems unless you have proven yourself to be sincerely loyal. If you're certain I'm upset about something, just ask. Approaching me sincerely and without accusation will probably merit a truthful response. But don't come to inform me of how I must be feeling by putting words in my mouth. You'll probably be wrong, only placing me in an awkward spot.

“...Extroverts often incorrectly assume that introverts are suffering. Introverts internalize problems; we like to take things inside and work on them there. Extroverts prefer to externalize and deal with problems interactively. Because of this difference, introverts may seem psychologically burdened, while extroverts spread the burden around and seem healthier—from an extroverted standpoint. But note that I said introverts like to take problems inside. Sure, an introvert can overdo it, but so can the extrovert who feels compelled to express every unresolved thought or emotion."

8.) APPRECIATE THEM FOR WHO THEY ARE

Introverts have so many strengths. Intuitive, creative, detail conscious, loyal, sincere, focused, strong empathizers, and self-sufficient to name a few. Be grateful for them and refrain from making comments about "growing out of it" or needing to "come out your shell." These only further the misconception that introversion is undesirable and weird, and hurts self esteem.  Yes, we tend to be quiet. But why do you have to keep bringing it up? Introverts need a moment to observe and process before jumping into a situation...and that's okay! Just give some personal space, advance notice, time to think it out, and don't underestimate what those quiet, introverted folks are capable of. 

Let me end with one of the most meaningful compliments of my life. I once overheard a favorite college professor say of me to my Bishop: 

"She's quiet...but there's a world of depth in her."

This meant a great deal to me because it was one of the few times I felt validated for who I am as an introvert, rather than made to feel guilty...like I'm supposed to change or fix myself. Assume this is true about the introverts in your life, that there is a world of depth in them not visible to the outside eye...and appreciate their need to keep it sacred. 

DE-STRESS-IFYING 2014

7:00 AM. Fresh snow. Fog. -15 degrees. Power outage. School closures. 

Back in December, I stood at my kitchen window and watched the sun rise over this sparkling fog. 

It was so lovely and dreamlike I felt compelled to take exactly thirty-three pictures of the scenery. As you will probably get bored after ten, I narrowed it down. And since I don't have anything interesting to say about them except for variances of:

'Holy cow, I love our holy flippin' incredibly beautiful view..." 

I will instead babble about my thoughts for the new year.

2014 has begun on a solemn note: pressure from unexpected sources, stress, disappointment, discouragement, post-vacation blues, hormones, and stewed together with a little selfish feelin'-sorry-for-myself. 

Blah, blah, blah, right?

I'm hoping to rise out of this funk soon. In the meantime, setting new goals does help. They provide new direction and focus. And my focus for the year is: de-stress-ifying. 

My personality tends to be...intense. I feel things deeply and have a ridiculous need to be perfect. I make things happen when I set my mind to it, and things usually work out for me. But when they don't...especially after exerting all my energy to make it so...I feel like a big, fat failure in all areas of my life. 

I'm telling you, the stress will kill me if I don't get a handle on it.

(Sheesh, I'm already weary of this topic. Let's just cut to the chase!)

temple view

It negatively impacts my health in many ways, so this is what I'm going to do about it...

1. Exercise. 

With an emphasis on relaxation and meditation...om-ing and namaste-ing included, if necessary. (Though I'm still trying to understand what Denise Austen means by: "breathe out through your belly button.") 

I bought some yoga tapes at a thrift store, and I found that the local library has a nice collection. Losing weight it not the goal here. I just need to be healthier mentally so I can be healthier physically. I am making it a huge priority. 

2. Refrain from Gossip.

Being at peace with others will help my stress level. Speaking negatively of them will only compound any anger, annoyance, or frustration. There's no reason to spread it around and cause the problem to grow; just let it go.

3. Watch my Tone of Voice.

It's more than just not yelling at Andrew for tracking mud on my freshly mopped floor...ahem. It's also not letting annoyance leak out when the changing room attendant forgets about me trying on new bras in stall number 3, and unlocks the door to a wide-eyed line of embarrassed customers. She obviously didn't mean to, so just chill out and laugh it off. 

And just because this is the fifteenth time since recess that I've asked Bobby Jo not to lean back in his chair, doesn't mean I have to sound like an ogre. Breathe in...breathe out...stay calm and relaxed. Next time, just very calmly, kindly, even lovingly...take that darn chair away altogether.

4. Remember Family & Friends

Those I love the most are (usually, anyway!) some of my greatest stress relievers. I admire them, and I rejoice in their successes.We have fun together. As such, they deserve more attention. I need to be better at keeping in touch, remembering birthdays, and inviting old friends over. As the majority of our family lives far away, I see a lot of letter writing in my future. 

5. Stop Being a Socially Awkward Weirdo

Think of clever, hilarious, pertinent things to say in all situations. Be charming and confident. Laugh infectiously. Most importantly, learn how to prevent my face from turning scarlet every time I'm put on the spot or addressed unexpectedly.

Well, never mind. One shouldn't take on too much at one time, now should she? Maybe next year.

THE END OF A LOVE AFFAIR WITH SUGAR {part 4}

Confused? This post is number 4 in a series. You can catch up by reading:

{post #1 here}

{post # 2 here}

{post #3 here}

TREATMENT
Candida is supposed to be very difficult to be rid of. This is how I am working to do it.

First, I'm taking essential oil capsules 3x a day for 10 days to cleanse my intestinal tract. These contain oregano, melaleuca, lemon, lemongrass, peppermint, and thyme. Next, I'm taking a probiotic 3x a day for 5 days. Then, I will give my body a rest for 10 days before  reassessing my symptoms. I expect to probably have to go through the cycle one more time. Throughout, I am drinking about 60 oz of lemon water a day and turning my diet completely upside down. 

This diet I speak of? I hate it with the power of a thousand suns. 

DIET
In order to fully cleanse the yeast, I can't eat anything that would continue to feed them. This includes all sugars (natural and artificial), wheat, grain, starches, gluten, dairy products, or fungi's (like mushrooms). I am not eating fruit. I am not eating bread. I am not eating milk, butter, or cheese. And I am not even eating POPCORN. Just lots of vegetables, eggs, meats, and beans. 

I would never agree to such a strict diet permanently. It is just during the cleanse. Then I will reintroduce the fruit, starchy vegetables like potatoes, real butter, oats, brown rice, sweeteners like honey and molasses, sprouted grain breads, and POPCORN.

Let me emphasize the fact again that I really. really. love. popcorn. And to be without it causes great emotional pain.

WITHDRAWALS
The candida gets angry with me each time I cut off another one of their food sources. It really is amazing the way the Lord has given me guidance in bits and pieces...just enough for me to handle at one time. It wasn't until recently that I learned it's best to cut foods out slowly and work your way up to the complete diet. But that is exactly what I did, by accident.

First it was the sugar and white carbohydrates. That withdrawal was the pits. Then I cut the bad fats and used organic olive and coconut oil for cooking. I went on like this for a long time before learning dairy feeds candida. Goodbye milk and cereal. Goodbye cheddar cheese. A few weeks later all gluten grains had to go. This step was hard, but manageable. I could live without my bread and tortillas.

Then, when I decided to cut the fruit and starchy vegetables...I hit the hardest withdrawal yet. That is what I've been dealing with for the last week. Would it be dramatic to say it's been one of the most difficult weeks of my life? Well, that's what I'm saying. And it's been downright hellish.

I think I've finally cut out the last of the food that candida can eat. And now they hate my stinkin' guts and want to spend the last moments of their little lives making me miserable. 

FRUSTRATION and ROADBLOCKS
There seem to be a lot of them.

• My cravings have come back in full force. It's as if my mind CAN'T stop thinking of donuts. Honey smothered toast. Popcorn. Cookies. Cake with an inch of frosting. It's torture. 

• An interesting withdrawal symptom has been that my face always feels...inflamed. Especially my lips. Like I'm slightly sunburned or dehydrated. It doesn't hurt. It's just weird. But with all the water I've been drinking, I know I'm not parched. But apparently others have experienced this too.

• The emotional impacts have been the biggest surprise. Cravings this week are accompanied by a miserable depression. The smallest things send me to tears. I had a meltdown after waking up one morning with the intention of making a veggie omelet...only to find we didn't have eggs. Our Valentine's dinner date was a bust. I ate my salad with hearty vegetables, beans, and egg--something I usually love--only to find my low morale turning everything tasteless and unsatisfying. Sitting across from Andrew's plate of pizza and pasta was almost more than I could bare. 

• I am always eating and I am always hungry. Rarely does my food satisfy me. I eat my veggies with lots of protein and healthy fat, but my body remains unimpressed by anything other than the junk it craves. It's like I will never feel full again without a piece of bread or hunk of cheese.  Then the "hunger pangs" drive me mad...and I find myself hating the entire blasted world. 

• I'm bitter and angry that everyone else can eat anything they want and be okay. It's not FAIR!

• My fragile mental state is compounded by a frustration with the many views on what should and shouldn't be eaten on a candida cleanse diet. Just when I think I'm doing it right, I read another contradiction. I've found variances on the following items: green apples, sweet potatoes, quinoa, butter, yogurt, hummus, carrots, and even popcorn. Its especially hard that I really want to eat these things. But I've decided to be safe rather than sorry with most of these. 

• I'm losing weight. I have definitely found the perfect weight loss plan. However, at maybe 110 pounds and a naturally petite build, I am WELL aware that weight loss is not desirable.

• People are noticing my change in diet and commenting that I don't need to lose weight. This makes me grumpy. (See above bullet point)

• I spend every spare moment in the kitchen. The food I'm eating these days all require significant preparation of some kind. I spend hours cleaning, chopping, thawing, roasting, mixing, and preparing in order to have enough to eat for three meals a day. I took for granted how easy it was to spend 3 minutes whipping up a sandwich for lunch. Or grabbing a quick handful of tortilla chips for snacking.

• Our itty-bitty town has one hole-in-the-wall health food store. Maybe it's easier for others to eat all natural and organic. But we are severely limited 'round these parts. 

• Healthy eating is expensive. We ate a lot of fresh food before this...but not this much. And all the candida diets stress organic produce. Without being 100% on this point, our monthly grocery bill has already DOUBLED.

AND A FEW HAPPY FINDS

• I've discovered an essential oil blend, DoTerra's Slim and Sassy (with grapefruit, lemon, peppermint, ginger, and cinnamon) that people use while trying to lose weight because of its natural ability to soothe appetite and cravings. Well, what do you know? They also soothe the insatiable appetite and cravings of a candida cleansing gal like me. It somehow grounds me mentally and emotionally too--keeping Crazy Rachel at bay. It works. Just ask Andrew. 

• I am learning some fun new ways to eat. I am becoming a substitution expert and love the recipes I'm cooking with previously untried vegetables, herbs, spices, and other ingredients. I look forward to sharing a few in a future post. 

• This current bout of withdrawals shouldn't last more than a week before I begin to feel...stable again. I'm almost there. 

So I think I am currently on a road to what I hope...and PRAY FERVENTLY will result in long-term healing. Sorry I'm so grumpy in the meantime.

Wish me Luck,
Rachel

THE END OF A LOVE AFFAIR WITH SUGAR {part 3}

Confused? This post is number 3 in a series. You can catch up by reading:
{post #1 here.}
{post # 2 here}

Written Early December 2013 
I am shocked at my self control. Church activity refreshments, faculty room treats, and neighbor gifts have all been resisted with an iron clad will. As a result, my cycle continues to be regular, I rarely have sugar cravings, and I feel plain awesome. Unintended--but not unwelcome--results include fewer headache, faster growing hair and nails, and lost inches around my mid section. It helped that a warning was issued to my students that all sugary Christmas gifts would go instead straight to Mr. Ashmore. I just couldn't accept twenty-two plates of homemade fudge, gingerbread, or candy cane encrusted sugar cookies...and remain strong.

However, I did allow for concessions over the holidays. We indulged in our usual Christmas Eve chocolate fondue, I requested almond M&M's in my stocking, and for our anniversary we made a stop at the Cheesecake Factory. The main side effects of this sudden sugar onslaught included acne breakouts, immediate sore throats, fatigue, and a general feeling of nauseous ickiness. So far, it has not caused any irregular bleeding...which shows me I can have an occasional treat betwixt all this rabbit food! But still. The side effects I did have were negative enough that my no-sugar decision seems to have been justified. And so it continues.

This new year is going to be exciting. A new juicer and blender will allow for fruit and veggie treats that will be a welcome variation to what I've been eating. Plus, Andrew is all gung ho about getting back in shape. He wants to exercise and eat healthier...which will only make it easier for me to do so.


That entry makes me laugh. 
I sound so enthusiastic. So full of hope and enjoyment for life.

What a pathetic, naive soul I was back then.

I wrote that post right after Christmas. I kept it filed away as a draft because there was more to add. More than a month later, it still isn't finished. And...MAJORLY outdated.  But here it is anyway to accompany a real update of my crazy health crusade. 

Much has changed.

Since then, only knowing my issues were sugar and stress induced, I continued to research. Further underlying causes? Long term impact? Preventative measures? 

I began to notice common threads in medical articles, websites, health classes, and  conversations with others that intrigued me. Things like "estrogen dominance" "cortisol" "adrenal overdrive" and "candida" were everywhere. The word "Candida" seemed to echo in my mind for weeks. Finally I prayed about it. My answer was clear, direct, and undeniable. Candida needed to be my focus.

WHAT IS CANDIDA?
Most people associate candida with yeast infections. It's true they can be related, but candida is so, so much more. And it impacts more than just woman. Several sources I came across stated that 70-80% of all adults suffer from a candida overgrowth of some kind. 

Usually, there is a normal, healthy amount of yeast in our digestive tract. But sometimes an overgrowth of the yeast can occur. The body responds to these parasites by putting up hot, red walls of inflammation in an effort to block their progress. However, chronic inflammation can cause an insanely long list of health issues.

CAUSES?
What causes an overgrowth of this yeast through the body? The following is a list of a few things that can literally feed the candida until it is out of control.

• Chronic stress 
• Causes the adrenals to overproduce which causes hormone imbalances with elevated estrogen levels. Estrogen feeds the yeast growth.
• Birth-control pills 
• Also causes an increase in estrogen
• High-sugar diet
• Antibiotics
• Caffeine
• Refined Carbohydrates

I find it very interesting I felt so inspired NOT to take the birth control pills doctors kept prescribing to me to fix my hormonal imbalances. It would have actually only worsened the underlying issue.

I also find it very interesting that when I was seeking answers back in September about my bleeding, the repeated response I got was limit my stress and limit my sugar! At the time I didn't understand why. Makes sense now, right?

SYMPTOMS?
The list below makes me wonder how many people are misdiagnosed and/or are busy treating symptoms for things that they never would guess originate from issues in their gut! Here are the most common areas problems arise.

• Emotional
• anxiety, depression, mood wings, intense cravings for sweet, salty, or dairy foods

• Respiratory
• asthma, coughs, sore throats, sinus issues, difficulty swallowing, chronic post-nasal drip, allergies

• Digestive
• constipation, diarrhea, gas, bloating, large abdomen "beer belly", pain, heartburn, nausea, bad breath

• Skin
• acne, eczema, hives, rashes, nail fungus

• Mental
•  inability to concentrate (brain fog), ADD/ADHD, insomnia, fatigue 

• Reoccurring Infections
• vaginal yeast infections, UTI's, bladder infections, earaches

• Female Specific 
• PMS, abnormal mentrual cycles, infertility, miscarraiges, endometriosis

• Other
• restless leg syndrome, headaches, sexual problems, high cholesterol, triglycerides, or blood pressure, swollen joints, gout, weight gain--especially around the mid-section, weight loss, dizziness, chronic pelvic pain, cold hands, feet, or nose, blurred vision, pale skin with dark circles under the eyes

And that is the short list. I am not going to fill you in on all of my personal symptoms, but if I were to highlight them for you, you would see why I am putting myself through this process.  


LONG-TERM EFFECTS?
The above list is just the everyday symptoms. Chronic inflammation does much, much worse to us over time depending on its location. 

Crohn's disease. Multiple Sclerosis. Rheumatoid Arthritis. Heart Disease. Stroke. Alzheimer's Disease. One source said that doctors in Europe have begun requiring a candida cleanse from their patients before undergoing cancer treatment. They have found that you just don't have cancer without having candida as well. 


TREATMENT?
Well...this post is getting a bit long. So in two days, plan on a follow-up post that explains all the blasted things I have to do to get well again. It'll be filled with drama, tears, and angst. 

I'm sure you can't wait. 


STILL CURIOUS?
These are a few of the sources I referred to as I studied all of this out for myself. If you have the desire to learn more, check them out.

• The Essential Alchemist
• Vitamin Research Products "The Hidden Causes Behind Hormonal Imbalances," by Sherill Sellman
• Healing Heart Oils, "The DoTerra Answer to Candida"
• Webinar: "Natural Solutions for Candida with Dr. Sue Lawton"
• YeastInfectionAdvisor.com "Understanding the Structure of Candida, Yeast, and Fungi"
• Candida MD

P.S. I think I just wrote a research paper of my own accord...because I wanted to. What the heck is wrong with me? On the bright side, I won't have anyone grading me on how incorrectly my sources are formatted. 

See you soon,
Rachel


UPDATE: Part 4 can be found here. It explains more about what I am going to do about the candida, now that I know I have it. 

WHILE I WAS OUT...

INSTAGRAM
I have become drawn in by this fun, free app. I think it is the culprit behind my long absence from blogging. It fills a void that blogging usually satisfies by capturing moments and documenting a visual journal of sorts...but in an instantaneous, effortless way. This was too enticing to resist during the holidays especially. 

Just in case life gets crazy again, my blogging slacks off, and you'd like to stay updated on our daily happenings (which are fascinating, I'm sure), my Instagram username is rachelashmore. My account is private to those who I have not approved to be my followers, but that is to keep away creepos from knowing where I am and what I'm doing at any given moment. Just find my profile and request to follow my account. As long as you're not a creepo...it's cool.

SUGAR UPDATE.
I planned to include a little update on how my sugar-less diet is going. But as I typed, it became clear I need to save it for its own post. There was too much to say. Until then, suffice it to say,  I am still avoiding the stuff, I feel great, and I have learned more about the reasons behind my issues which in turn has shown me another favorite food that should also, sadly enough, be cut out of my diet.

PRAYER
A recent difficult experience taught me some interesting aspects of prayer. First of all, if I don't tell anyone that I need help, I am actually hindering God's ability to answer my prayers for strength or comfort or whatever. Isn't it through other people that God usually answers our prayers? Being a private, independent person in general, I think this was an important lesson for me to learn.

It was only hours after I was forced to tell coworkers, neighbors, or church members about what we were going through that I was keenly aware not only of my sudden increased strength but of the fact that it was a result of prayers on my behalf. This knowledge came clearly and distinctly, and glowed brightly in my heart making me--to my great annoyance--emotional for days. I suddenly had a different perspective on how faith and prayers can be applied to help others--and myself--in a very real way. Prayer is powerful. It works. And our Father in Heaven wants us to use it to serve and help our brothers and sisters.

DOTERRA ESSENTIAL OILS.
Has anyone else out there discovered the magic of these babies? I'm obsessed. They are amazing, and it boggles my mind that more people/medical professionals aren't aware of all they are capable of. Andrew and I use them daily for ailments such as infections, headaches, warts, sore throats, restless leg syndrome, insomnia, snoring (you better believe that's Andrew...not me), congestion, digestive issues, acne, allergies, mood swings, or pain of any kind.

Anytime someone around me complains of an ailment, I can immediately come up with in my mind, an oil that would help. But the few times I've actually opened my mouth to share the idea, I only come across as a silly-naturalist-hippie-nut. I'm sharing on the blog, because I can't see your frozen phony smiles and skeptical expressions from here. Expect more to come in the future. You've been warned.

CC
After an absence of several months, our kitty sauntered into the house like no big deal. He hung around long enough to get scratched behind the ears and show off his doubled-in-size mid section before slinking out the back door not to be seen again. It seems CC has abandoned us for a new family. This arrangement seems to suit us all just fine. And at least I can take comfort in the knowledge that he's getting fed reeeally well.

OMEN
So we've all heard about the bad luck to follow a black cat crossing our path, right? But does it mean anything special if a WHITE cat crosses your path? How about an entire herd of white cats?

Well actually a group of cats isn't called a herd. It's a clowder. I looked it up just now because herd sounded weird.

Driving down the highway to work, I suddenly had to brake hard for a clowder of kitties. A mom and six kittens. All pure white and running to an empty field across the street. The last little kitten was a feisty one. Stopping in the middle of the road, it stood fiercely facing me in the cutest, little battle stance I've ever seen. After all if its siblings were safely across it disappeared behind them into the long grasses.

There you have it. My pointless story...except to inform you that it's going to be an awesome-filled, lucky year. It's all very logical. White is an antonyms for black. Black is unlucky. So obviously, I'm going to have the opposite of horrible misfortune. Bring on 2013!

ANOTHER POINTLESS STORY
Each year, my family plays a Turkey Day football game. I participate to feel involved...however, I use the word "participate" very loosely. Participating for me usually entails running back and forth pointlessly and receiving maybe three pitty passes. I still have fun though. My sister on the other hand, has rebelled against the tradition entirely, and refuses to play. She prefers not to be pitied.

This year, my cousin got a helmet camera for the quarter back to wear, which allowed for some sweet playback footage. When the video was posted on social media, I anxiously pulled it up. At the end, I sat in shame at one awful, glaringly obvious fact: 

I am very, very, very sissy. 

Not having really considered myself to be a cream puff before, all that twinkle-toed running and hand flapping was hard to watch. Maybe my sister's onto something.

THE END OF A LOVE AFFAIR WITH SUGAR {part 2}

{Confused? This post is number 2 in a series. You can read post number 1 right here.}

As I researched all sorts of ailments unrelated to my sugar intake at all, I began having tiny suspicions that eventually led me like a trail of breadcrumbs to a site that explained everything.

I was startled to learn that sugar stimulates the same brain pleasure receptors as drugs like heroine and morphine. Stopping my sugar intake was mimicking that of drug withdrawal! If sugar is addictive to that extent, it must've truly been doing awful things to my body! The website went on to list indications of a detox/withdrawal that matched my strange conglomeration of symptoms exactly: cravings, headache, flu-like symptoms, cold sweats, anxiety, irritability, and extreme fatigue. 

Finding this information acted as validation that a sugar detox was the right thing to do. I continued to eat as natural and healthy as possible, took vitamins, and avoided sugars and refined carbohydrates (like white rice, flour, and most cereals) that have the same effect on our body as sugars.

But sugar is so addictive I was apparently relying on it for daily energy and mood boosts. This became especially apparent at the end of the day by powerful cravings for treats to comfort and reward myself for surviving stressful, hard, tiring days at work. Ice cream, cereal, cookies, pastries, a candy bar...these "rewards" have been more frequent than I'm proud of. 

Then there are the awkward social situations. Friends serving pie, neighbors dropping by with treats, Halloween parties, and the teacher's lounge I had to avoid for an entire day because of the pile of soft, frosted sugar cookies on plate in the middle of the table. 

The next Relief Society activity is entirely planned around everyone bringing a favorite holiday treat to share! I guess my stalk of celery and I will be sitting home that night. 

Then the dreams started. Of frenzied binges on cookies. Or of a magical tree with innumerable streamers hanging long and bright from its branches. The tree was the scene of a party. People milled through the streamers, visiting each other, and enjoying the countless sugary desserts tied for the taking to each strip of color. It was beautiful.

A vision of the tree of life, I tell ya.

But in all seriousness, this no-sugar-thing is totally working. Within ONE week, my most serious health issue cleared up completely. Like, after five whole months of bleeding and years of irregularity, I felt my cycle correct itself. Other effects of my new eating habits include: better sleep, clearer skin, a disappearance of some poochy stomach bloating that I thought was normal, and an overall feeling of good health.

So now that I have been off sugar for about a month and I can see it's benefits, the BIG QUESTION is: 

Am I doomed to avoid sugar for the rest of my life? 

I doubt it. Or I should say, I hope not. 

It's not a practical way to live. No one would ever know what to cook for me...the crazy 'health nut'. And what about the fact that every holiday is somehow tied to sugary treats? That would mean no more birthday cake, no more Christmas Eve chocolate fondue, no more conference morning french toast, no more New Year's Martinelli's, and no more Halloween cookies monsters. What else is there to live for?! 

Okay, I'm just kidding. Don't answer that. 

But I have decided to be strong until Thanksgiving. To give my body time to undergo a proper detox. This doesn't mean I'm going to let it all fall apart after that...not now that I am aware of sugar's  powerful hold on me. I'll just be more aware and moderate. Maybe I'll allow myself a slice of pumpkin pie (Or now that I think about it, I believe my aunt makes a sugar free pie every year). It might be helpful to see if my body can handle a little bit, just around holidays, without going haywire again. An experiment. 

Well, there's my sugar shpeel. I appreciate the encouragement from post number 1. Your support helps. It's still a daily fighting battle, and sharing it with all of you kind of forces me to be even more accountable. I'll keep you updated and maybe blog some of the healthier recipes we've been using lately. Please share any ideas you have...especially for snacks! When cravings hit, my go-to snack has been an apple with natural peanut or almond butter, but I fear this will get old real fast.

Also, thank you to Ellen, whose own journey with infertility and a sugar fast was an answer to prayer. This post was the push that initially got this ball rolling. 

THE END OF A LOVE AFFAIR WITH SUGAR {part 1}

Sugar. White flour. Processed Food. 

So apparently, this stuff is bad? Yeah, whatever. Blah, blah, blah. Everyone's doing it...and most importantly, I love it too much. Sugar literally fills my bones with warmth and happiness to the very core. Pathetic, I know, how much I'm NOT exaggerating. But it's true. 

Sugar is my drug of choice.

However, I recently took on the challenge of a healthier lifestyle to correct some health issues I have struggled with for years. The deciding factor being that these issues are impacting our fertility...something we are not so cool with. I have been to doctors in the past only to be deeply dissatisfied. Test after test is conducted before the doc basically tells me he doesn't know what's wrong. Then he slaps me with a huge bill and a prescription that either a) is experimental, or b) makes me so gut-wrenchedly uncomfortable that I don't even end up using it (as if my body/soul/the Lord were literally warning me it wasn't right.) Still, something had to be done.

Not wanting to visit another doctor again unless I had to, I did my own research. I prayed. I fasted. I talked to others and listened to quiet heavenly promptings. The thoughts that kept coming to me always revolved around the combination of sugar and stress. Sugar and stress. And sugar, sugar, SUGAR.

So grudgingly, with many complaints, but with the loving support of my husband, I cut sugar completely out of my diet. I'm talking COLD TURKEY. 

My meals now consist of ingredients from a list of things like: 

• brown rice
• eggs
• wheat tortillas
• fish
• almonds
• cheese
• natural peanut butter
• chicken
• black beans
• garbanzo beans
• sour cream
• fruit
• And lots and lots of vegetables. 

Every week, I make veggie grab bags filled with celery, broccoli, cauliflower, carrots, bell peppers, peas, and baby tomatoes. Then I easily take one with me to work or on errands to snack on all day long. 

Eating the healthy food has not been a challenge. Luckily, I've always enjoyed my vegetables and consciously tried to include them into my diet. The challenge lies in the fact that I always combine my health food with LOADS of sugar. 

I don't usually drink soda (except for an occasional root beer with pizza), and I buy raisin bran instead of Captain Crunch...but I adore my cookies. My Moose Tracks ice cream. My brownies. My muffins. My candy. My hot chocolate. My pancakes with syrup. My birthday cake with frosting. My apple juice. My cinnamon rolls. My banana bread. My dessert pizzas. My hostess fudge rolls. And my blessed maple frosted doughnut (Should I even need to remind you of the time I actually wrote poetry in praise of doughnuts). And many items that I never considered to be junk food have a surprising amount of sugar: yogurt, granola, and "healthy" cereals, just to name a few. 

Not having sugar has been a lot harder than I anticipated. 

A living hell, actually. 

After about 3-4 days I thought there was something seriously wrong with me. I had the strangest headache. The cold I thought I had beat hung on with a vengeance. And I felt so devoid of energy by lunch time all I wanted in the whole world was sleep. Being an elementary teacher is exhausting, but the fatigue doesn't usually hit me until my drive home. The busy-ness and adrenaline keeps me motivated and moving until the end. But that day, I sat in my classroom feeling listless and ragged. I stared at my expectant students with zero desire to even stand to address them. 

Later, after collapsing on my couch at home, I continued to wonder what the heck was wrong with me. At the risk of sounding dramatic...was I dying? In genuine fear, I knelt down and prayed with fervor for the knowledge to understand what was wrong and for the tools to correct it. 

I stood up and went straight to the Internet to research. 

What I found shocked me. 



{As this post is getting reeeally long, I though I would break it into two parts. The second one is scheduled to post in a few days. See ya then!}

BEAT THE BLUES

Whether triggered by a lousy event (like your husband being away on business for two flippin' weeks), hormones, or seemingly nothing at all...we've all felt it. That glum, depressing haze where nothing and everything is wrong all at the same time. I've learned to recognize it the moment it appears: my getting restless, overly self-critical, overwhelmed over nothing, and just plain sad. 

Hopefully, none of you are feeling down these days, but maybe someone out there can benefit from a few tricks I've learned to to prevent the blues from spiraling into something long term. And a reminder for myself couldn't hurt either.


1. Upbeat Music
 There is just no hangin'-around-feeling-sorry-for-yourself with Michael Jackson rocking out in the background. Favorite tunes instantly energize me out of a slump. And I highly encourage singing (and dancing!) along.

2. Let the Sunlight in
Open you blinds! Draw back the curtains! And if it's warm enough, open those windows all the way. The sunshine, fresh air, and an open feeling lifts moods. Sitting in a dark, closed-off house will only make things worse.

3. Exercise
It's all about the endorphins, people. Why not take advantage of the body's natural, safe, self-produced morphine-like euphoric? These endorphins are produced, among other ways, through physical exercise. Another benefit is the self esteem boost as your hind parts lose inches.

4. Get Out in Nature
Go take a walk! Nature seems to have a calming impact on my psyche. God's creations in all their forms are simply beautiful. To see nature doing its thang puts life back into perspective and reminds me who is really in charge of my crazy life. 


5. Bring Nature Indoors
Who says you have to wait for your man to buy the flowers? Go pick out a bunch of your favorites and display them in a vase where you spend most of your time in the house.  If you can't afford the  big, beautiful bouquets at the flower shop, go for a $3 bunch at your local grocery store. The added happiness is worth the expense in my book.

6. Make a To-Do List
This gives needed structure and motivation.Write down everything you hope to accomplish in the day...even as simple as brushing your teeth or making the bed...and then stick to it.  Drawing a line through it afterward will make you feel so purposeful. And go ahead, add something to the list after you've done it, just for the satisfaction of crossing it off!


7. Clean the House
Cleanliness invites good feelings. Try setting the timer for 10, 20, or 30 minutes and cleaning like mad until the timer buzzes. Those few minutes of putting things in their proper place and wiping the counters will make your house a happier place to be.


8. Rearrange the Furniture
Stir things up! There is something about a little bit of change that is just...fun. Try putting the dresser on the opposite side of  the bedroom. Rearrange the decor on the entertainment center. Or put that arm chair in a different room entirely. Maybe I'm crazy. But a fresh view in my house has worked for me!

9. Purge
Clutter will only make you feel stressed out. Do you really need five wooden spoons? Thirty-six pairs of shoes? Seven years worth of Parent magazines stacked in the corner? Gather twenty-five items from around the house that you can donate. Then put them in a box, drive to Goodwill, and get rid of it today!


10. Dress Up
I lived with an aunt who would put on her Sunday best on days she was feeling down. Makes sense. I'm not going to feel great about myself if at 5 o'clock I'm still in sweats and yesterday's makeup. Take a hot shower (which is happy enough as it is!), put on a favorite outfit, and apply that lip gloss. It mentally prepares you to tackle the upcoming day.

11. Be with People
When you're all alone, it is easier to feel sorry for yourself. Stop moping around and call up a friend, go to that weeknight church activity, join a book club, visit family, or even treat yourself to ice cream...anything to remind you you're not alone in the world. Or the only one with problems.


12. Do What You Love
What's your favorite hobby? Personally, jumping in to an activity that gets my creative juices flowing makes me feel alive and invigorated...whether that's photography, drawing, decorating, teaching, or arts and crafts. 

13. Turn to God
I know that when scripture study, prayer, and worship is a priority in my life, I feel better able to bear any unhappy burden weighing me down. There is no greater source of strength and comfort than through the reality of the Lord's atonement. 

MITT ROMNEY

Mitt Romney came to Idaho Falls this week. I wanted to go, but it was in the middle of the work day. Hearing all of the buzz about it got me thinking...

I am not very political. And there is a lot I don't understand about national debt and taxes and social security...but I do know I believe in:

1. Traditional family values
2. More money for education with less federal regulation
3. The Death Penalty
4. Eliminating the option to live on welfare for years without accountability
5. Drilling for oil in America starting...yesterday
6. Big army
7. Small government that butts out of people's personal lives 

I am definitely a conservative.

With Mitt Romney--a Mormon, being the republican front-runner in this upcoming election, I am put in a unique situation, being a Mormon myself. I feel a greater responsibility to make an informed decision here. 

Romney's religion seems to generate a lot of media attention. And right or wrong, it may be the deciding factor for some whether they will, or will not, vote for him. 
.
I don't understand the person who would never vote for him in a million years based on his Mormonism alone. This is so closed minded.
.
For example:
"Ahh! Don't vote for him! He's a MoRmON! We don't want a cult member in the White House! His prophet will end up making all of the decisions, and it's a conspiracy to convert the world!"
.
But it would be just as closed minded to vote for him because he is Mormon. 
.
In contrast:
"Hooray! A Mormon in the White House! Any decision he makes in office must be the right decision! It will solve all of the world's problems!"
.
Just because Mitt Romney is a member of the religion I believe and live, does not mean his views on government will match mine. And there is no guarantee he will be an honest, upstanding politician either. Nobody is perfect.

{source}

I don't want to be the kind of person to vote that way...or ever be accused of such. Instead, I will understand each of the candidates' platforms, backgrounds, and track records. So then IF I do end up voting for Mitt Romney, it won't be because he's Mormon, or because he's probably a shoe-in for the Republican candidacy anyway(if he's going to win, I might as well vote for him, right?). It will be because he is the one I can trust to most closely match my personal, political views based on my research.


Well, there you have it. My extremely limited spouting on politics. Take it for what it's worth. I am not campaigning for any certain person, just encouraging you all to be informed. 

                                                  Source: google.com via Rachel on Pinterest

I welcome any comments...even of different opinions. But I am NOT opening it up for vicious attacks on me, my religion, or my political views. Be polite. Please and thank you.