WEEKEND...

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.1. This is how Andrew looked much of the time. Apparently, kidney stones aren't fun.

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2. Andrew's little bro' moved in all the stuff he'd need for his new life in Idaho, into our spare bedroom.

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Above, Andrew's helping Lane set up his computer. As for Lane, I'm not sure what he's doing. Maybe singing show tunes?

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But anyway, we're really excited about Lane's decision to attend BYU-Idaho. Yay!

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3. Look at that! He even brought his cowboy hat! Lane'll fit right in now. All he needs now is an old pickup and a dog to put in the back.

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4. Oh...and on Friday, I learned that it's official:

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the school year has been cut an entire week.

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It was something about budget cuts... saving a hundred grand...and other blah blah blah. All I heard, though, was that the last day of school would be May 27th rather than June 4th. And I still get paid for it. I cannot even begin to express just how okay I am with this change in plans.
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ELEMENTARY TABLOIDS

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1. I was standing at the door as students filed in after recess. A boy stopped to tell me about how he had scared a girl while she was jump roping. He enthusiastically described her reaction as:
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"The girl totally fruck out!"
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I thought it was a nice experiment with past tense.
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2. A student informed the class that his big sister was having a baby soon. Taking the tone of someone who knows what they're talking about, he said:
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"There's about a 90,000% chance of it being a boy...and a 5% chance that it's a girl."
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(Can you guess the gender he's rooting for?)
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3. This next kid tests my insanity with his distractedness. One day, in the middle of a discussion in math, this young man raised his hand and announced:
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"My mom's mom has 4 eyes on the back of her head."
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I'm not even joking. This was said with complete seriousness and with a look that showed he was preparing for us to be shocked and amazed. I think we were all shocked and amazed, just not in the manner he was intending.
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There was silence for about 5 seconds while I processed what I had just heard and got control of my bearings. Finally, I decided it was probably best just to ignore it. Turning away from him, I continued right on with our math discussion.
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4. I had just given the class some instructions, and they were busying themselves to accomplish the task. This same distracted kid, I found, however, to be wandering around the the opposite side of the classroom...doing only goodness knows what. When I reminded him of my instructions and asked him what he was doing, he sighed heavily and said:
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"Sorry, Mrs. Ashmore. I get sidetracked very good!"
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5. A student came up to me the moment he was off the bus.
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"Mrs. Ashmore! Did you know that mermaids are real?! They are! It's true!"
"What makes you say that?" I asked with a sigh.
"They found one! It floated up to shark level and a shark killed it. Then it came all the way up to the top and people on a boat found it!"
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(I stared at him for a moment.)
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"Okay," was my response.
(How else do you respond to that story when it's told with such excitement and surety?)
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6. Last year, we were having a class discussion about the presidential election. I was introducing the candidates and the concepts of political parties and platforms. I was just giving a very basic overview when a young lady raised her hand with a comment.
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"Barack Obama believes in...abominations." She said the last word hesitantly, as if she wasn't sure she had said it correctly. I was confused, so I asked what she meant by that.
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"He believes in killing babies."
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Her words suddenly became clear to me.
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"Oh, you mean abortion!
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(she nodded)
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"Yes...well...moving on!"
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I wasn't about to discuss that topic with a bunch of other people's 8 year-olds. But secretly, I had responded within myself:
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"Oh, that kind of abomination! Yes, you're right."
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I highly enjoyed her innocent, yet very fitting mix-up. =)
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SNAPSHOTS OF HOME

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Another rustic barn that HAD to be photographed.

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A horse. In the parking lot.
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Little planes from the little airport in town.
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Yep. Gone Fishing.

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Silos. Have the need to photograph them almost as often as rustic barns.

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LDS temple on the hill.

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It is an actual house, built to look like an actual boat.

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A dog awaits another car to chase down his country road.
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Red barn, in white snow, behind yellow buses.

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Melting snow.

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Charming old houses.
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Holy wildflowers! (Nearby mountains)

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Rexburg's spray park: A happenin' place in the summer.
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Farmer's Market.
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Sand dunes.

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Not sure who Tom is...but love his meadow.

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Harvest time.
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. Spuds!
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Mater himself.
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Snake River Valley
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Rustic Charm.
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Now that's classy...

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And getting classier. =)

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Only ten minutes from my house.
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And spacious skies.

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RECESS

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. I instructed two students to raise the flag in front of the school. They raced to the pole while I watched from the play yard. After they had it hanging successfully over the building, they raced back to me--their faces plastered with large, goofy grins. They were so proud! The kids excitedly turned back to admire their handiwork.
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After several seconds, however, one of the student's shoulders suddenly drooped dramatically, his excited smile turning upside down in horrible disappointment. Surprised by his change in mood, I looked at him expectantly. Eyes still on the flag, he pouted:
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"The wind needs to be blowing! It would look so much better!"
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I did my best not to laugh at his affliction, as I gazed back up at the flag, that was indeed hanging as limp as a wet noodle.
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Just then, I heard one of my little freckle-covered guys, exclaim: "Mrs. Ashmore, They've got me!" I surveyed the group of 4th grade girls, grasping his jacket firmly, and all grinning at me mischievously.
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"So girls, what are you going to do with him now that you've caught him?"
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They simply giggled in unison, as they began to drag him in the opposite direction. "We're going to suck his blood," the smallest one stated matter-of-factly, her pigtails bouncing as she walked (oh dear. that one's mother must be a Twilight fan).
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"Well, be sure to have him back in time for class. "
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*Another chorus of giggles*
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"Mrs. Ashmore, Noooooo! "
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This was all I heard, as they disappeared across the field. I sighed and let them go. For some reason, I just had the feeling that my little guy would be more disappointed if I did put a stop to the torture.
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Never a dull moment.
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LAUGHABLE

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If any of you work/worked at Micky D's and happened to love it...I apologize in advance.
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Christmas Morning
Graduating from high school
Getting asked out on a date by a crush
My Wedding Day
Student loans being forgiven
Summer vacation
Winning a free Shabby Apple dress
Tulip Bouquets arriving in the mail
Winter turning into spring
The neighbors with poopy dogs moving away
Free Miata convertibles...
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These are a few things that might merit such an exultation. (refer to picture above)
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A job at McDonald's is not generally one of them. I just don't believe any of the pimply-faced teenagers serving us chocolate-vanilla-twist cones the other night, felt the same way about their jobs as that man does on the poster. I look that guy every time I think about how I don't have to work at McDonald's to pay the bills. I love my current job, thank-you-very-much.
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I'd rather chase around, trying to educate, twenty-two nose pickin', chatter-box, summer-hungry 8-year olds any 'ol day.
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OUT OF THE BLUE

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Andrew: So...In The Sound of Music, does the nanny fall in love with the father?
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Rachel: (after a stunned silence) Yes, they get married.
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Andrew: The dad wasn't married?
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Rachel: No, he was a widow.
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Andrew: Oh.
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Rachel: Maria was about to take her vows as a nun. That's why it was complicated.
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Andrew: (nods) That's right.
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But she wasn't a very good nun, was she?
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Rachel: No.
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Andrew: (nods)

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(silence)
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...Maybe we should watch that move again sometime.
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Rachel: (stares back to gauge sincerity) ...Okay...
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Andrew: Maybe it'll give me some culture....
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Rachel: ...Okay.
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Andrew: ...so I don't just watch "man movies" all the time.
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Rachel: (laughs) Okay.
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INVICTUS

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One of my life-long best buds happens to be my cousin, Lenita. I love her.
But actually, this post isn't about her.
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It's about her hubby, John Keller.
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Every family reunion includes an evening of jamming and singing along with the guitars of some very talented family members. John happens to be one of them.
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My favorite song he plays is one that he wrote while he was dating Lenita. She was young and uncertain...he was in love and...very certain. Poor John channeled all of his angst into this super, amazing original song.
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They eventually worked through the excitement of dating, (Isn't dating the worst? So much drama!So many emotional highs and lows! It's exhausting to even look back on. Reeeally glad to be married is all I'm sayin'. Anyways....) got married, and now have 2 beautiful little ones with another on the way. They are a super couple.
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Please listen to it. Don't automatically assume it reeks of whiny, emotional, broken-hearted crap. It really doesn't...a reason I like it so much. It deserves be be spread far and wide until a music producer picks it up and makes them obscenely wealthy.

Press that little play button below and ENJOY!
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So, what do ya think?
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IN OTHER RANDOM NEWS

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Good evening, and welcome to another post of random, insignificant news in the life Rexburg, Idaho.
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1. Well, this is all that is left of my tulip bouquet.

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Obviously, even these guys aren't gonna last much longer. Hopefully the ones outside will be blooming before the end of the month.

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2. I love the view of this tree from our kitchen window. I have an entire collection of random pictures on my computer that I've taken after stopping in the window to admire its splendor. Sadly, the camera fails to capture its wild beauty. Every single photo seems to look like a regular 'ol tree.
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3. I laughed out loud today when I realized my pile of dirty laundry is currently as tall as I am. Literally.

I did not include a picture of this for several reasons: a.) It's embarrassing and b.) It is too difficult for me to look upon without feeling very, very tired.
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4. These are the neighbors dogs...the neighbor's dogs who are allowed to roam free and poop when never and where ever they happen to feel the urge. Unfortunately, that urge seems to arise too often, on our lawn.

I hate their stinkin', discourteous guts.
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We've discovered that yelling, screaming, throwing things, and making loud noises doesn't work. They simply return the moment we leave. So, our strategy has changed. We will now earn the dog's trust, lull them into a false sense of security, and then...
EAT THEM FOR DINNER!!!
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WAHAHAHAH!
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Okay, fine. We're still working on the details of our diabolical plan. All suggestions are welcome. And don't automatically rule out anything that includes a paintball gun, a bazooka, and/or shovels.
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P.S. It's best that you don't mention anything about how cute they are. This situation has rendered us unstable, and at this point, eating YOU for dinner has not been entirely ruled out either.
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5. Oh, and in other random news...the other day, we were given a car. For free. As in with no payments. As in a '98 Miata convertible.
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Here's Andrew having just driven it home from work that first day. He doesn't look all that pleased now does he? I think he's in love.

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I'm not sure what to do with it. I mean, we can't drive it. It deserves to be in commercials and Hollywood movies...not transporting us to buy bread and milk from the local, small-town grocery store.

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But I'm sure we can find some use for it. How about a country drive in the spring? How about a summer star-watching date with my sweetheart? And why do I have this sudden, passionate desire to take a drive down the Oregon Coast when school gets out? Cow-a-bunga, baby!

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Anyway. Until next time, this has been another post of Other Random News.

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A BEDTIME STORY

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*not my picture. Did not have the opportunity or sanity of mind to take one of my own.

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So last night, we were getting ready for bed when our neighbor knocked on the door.
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When he asked if I would hold a flashlight for him, I was intrigued, but not prepared for the horrible creature we would find huddled deep within our window well: A muskrat.
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It reminded me of those giant, rodent-monsters in the forests of A Princess Bride. Just smaller.
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Our neighbor proceeded to fish it out with an old, tin popcorn bucket. I was fascinated by the fight the animal was putting up when unexpectedly, to prevent from being bitten I suppose, our neighbor tossed the angry muskrat from the bucket, into the air, and out of the beam of light I had been directing at it. Keep in mind, it was pitch black outside...hence the flashlight.
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Terrifying images of a clawing, biting, snarling rodent flying towards me, sent me in a panic.
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At this point, I may have screamed like an opera singer. And I may have made the ascent to the hood of my car in less than half a second.
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But we were able to breathe a sigh of relief, as the flashlight beam found the animal, running awkwardly down the street in the opposite direction. Oh, how I hope it ran that way for a long, long time.
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In our bedroom before bed, I sincerely thanked God that no flying muskrats landed on me in the dark that night. I'm not even being facetious. My gratitude knew no bounds.

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HOW ARE YOU FEELING TODAY?

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Isn't this poster great? I have it hanging in my classroom.

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At the present moment, I feel:

exhausted

depressed

shy

frustrated

anxious

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Wow. I should have picked a different day to post this. I sound like such a downer. It seems to stem from everything that isn't "home" right now. All I want in the world are navy blue sweat pants, leftover Easter Cake, and my man. Let's just say, Spring Break should have been another day.

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But don't worry--It'll probably change in a few hours. That's one of the joys of being a woman. My moods rise and fall with the tide, my friends.

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Anyway...How 'bout you?

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SPRING BREAK DAY 4

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We watched our church's General Conference via the laptop. I enjoyed a Sunday without formal meetings...a Sunday where we were able to see each other before the evening meal.

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.Between sessions, I worked on updating our picture frames with more recent photos. I now have 12 frames to redistribute through the house.

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And Andrew surprised me with a homemade Easter Cake as he called it. =)
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Yes, the tulips continue to be an ever-present source of joy. They follow me around the house depending upon the room I am currently spending the most time in.

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Afterward, our need to expend extra energy took us on several walks. The second one lasted an hour and a half. We talked, laughed, pushed each other into puddles, and picked out aspects of neighborhood houses we'd want to add to the our dream home.

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Believe it or not, this was the least embarrassing of the photos we attempted.

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We also came across the Easter Bunny formed from quickly melting snow...

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And traces of big foot in our very own town! Check out that footprint!
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We hope you all had a happy Easter. Ours was the simplest, happiest, most relaxing of holidays. I love my Andrew, the church is true, and there is still one more day of Spring Break!

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